Limbo.

In my last blog I mentioned about how I had been feeling like we were in a state of limbo. Our appointment about our IVF referral is in 7 days. I was supposed to be starting a new cycle today and looking forward to next week’s news. Instead I feel unsure about what is happening with my body. This is exactly what I don’t need the week before eh at could be a big turning point of our trying to conceive journey.

I am now on Day 37 and still nothing! Up until now my period could just be considered late, but I think really it is bordering on missed. I consider myself a lucky PCOS lady as I have a regular periods. Yes, they can be 30-35 days apart but I never not have one. I always have a period within that time. That is until now. I am completely thrown. As you may have read in my previous post or on Twitter, I have already taken three pregnancy tests and had three negative results. These were taken on day 30, 33 & 35. I realised the other day that the first two were probably a bit premature. The last one I took was on the first day of what would be considered my missed period. I was officially late on day 36 ie yesterday. My husband and I discussed what we should do and decided that we weren’t going to bog ourselves down with more tests just in case. Instead we have said that if there is still no show, we will test again next Wednesday, a full week after the latest day my period should have been here by.

I still feel in a bit of limbo. I didn’t ever think we would be feeling like this when the end of the waiting game seems so close! On the one hand I feel like I’m just kidding myself. I mean who is lucky enough to get pregnant after accepting they have to have IVF and are so close to starting that bit of their journey?! Yet there is a part of me that feels like I’m not kidding myself as I am regular in my irregular periods. I should have been finished by period by now, starting a fresh cycle just in time for spring & hearing news about our fresh start with IVF. Waiting until next week to take another test is so hard! Waiting is hard. Why is waiting such a big part of trying to conceive?! I hate waiting and I hate feeling like I am in limbo.

Blog/Tweet soon x

As always please do comment on here or tweet me @HopeEpiMum

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