IVF#1 Cracked.

I cracked. On Saturday morning to be exact. 6dp5dt (6 days past, 5 day old embryo transfer) and I cracked. I woke up at 6AM with such bad cramps that they brought tears to my eyes. I went to the toilet for a wee and noticed the spotting. I’d had brown spotting for three days straight at this point and on that day it was heavier. This unsettled me as this is a usual sign that my period is on it’s way. I went back to bed willing sleep to come back, to distract from the pain and worry. After about an hour the thoughts had stepped up a gear. You know the thoughts, is this bad, what does this mean, is this a good sign? By 8AM I couldn’t stand it any longer. I went to the bathroom and fished out the pregnancy test that was leftover from before we started IVF. The test that my husband didn’t even know existed. If he had known about it he would have thrown it out before I could get near it. He had banned me from testing until our official test day. Continue reading

IVF#1 Seven Days.

Today is day four of our twelve day, two week wait. Yeah, work that one out! In other words I am 4dp5dt! For those new to trying to conceive lingo (including me, I’m still learning) that means I am 4 days past our transfer of a 5 day old embryo. So if I could just loop back on myself and repeat that we are on day 4 of our 11 day wait. Just under halfway through! Continue reading

IVF#1 A Week On.

This time last week I had just come out of my last follicle scan. I remember feeling a bit deflated whilst trying to stay optimistic. From what the sonographer had told me we could expect between three and five eggs at our collection on Tuesday. I know everyone always says its quality not quantity and you only need one to make an embryo but I still felt disappointed! Of course looking back I wished I hadn’t of worried. A lot of follicles are hidden and don’t show up on the scans. We were lucky enough to prove this, Continue reading

IVF#1 The Call.

Today is the day. The day we find out how many, if any, of my eggs were mature enough for ICSI (intracytoplasmic sperm injection) and if they were how many, if any fertilised. Otherwise known as the fert report. All we were told was this call would come at some time before midday! So here is a diary of my waiting and eventually the news this call will bring! Continue reading

IVF#1 Harvest Time.

Oh well have I got a lot to blog about! I’m feeling so happy and extremely lucky so apologies in advance for any gushing! Today was the day of our egg collection. We had to be at the clinic for 7:30am with a view to have the collection procedure at 8:30am. My hubby was feeling a bit nervous about this early start as not enough sleep and getting up too early is one of my Epilepsy seizure triggers, it turns out there was no need to worry! Continue reading

Spirit Baby

This blog post is so beautiful I had to share, the concept of spirit babies has helped me through this past week.

Mommyfriend

                                            
                                            [Image:naptimecards.com]

 

I haven’t taken to my blog to write about my personal experience with pregnancy loss nearly 4 years ago, perhaps in time I will share my story.  A dear friend sent me the following excerpt from Part IV of “BabyCatcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife” by Peggy Vincent when I needed it most.  This story brought me tremendous comfort and encouragement on my journey toward emotional healing and still touches me to this day. 

So for all my dear friends who have suffered a loss, this is for you.

Spirit Baby” Part IV of BabyCatcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife  by Peggy Vincent

Colin, my twelve-year-old son, discovered me late one rainy afternoon sitting at the kitchen table, a damp Kleenex crumpled in my left hand, wiping my eyes as I tried to compose myself for his sake. It was the third week of…

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